Oh, Davina. I always knew there was a dirty girl inside, but I think I now know where some of that naughtiness comes from. Lol.
It's always nice to look back and remember where we came from. Not to struggle or to understand....But to simply enjoy the nostalgia of our beginnings, of the moments that truly shape who we are.
Davina shares some thoughts....
I promised you a write up of my earliest dressing recollections, so here we go….
I can’t remember the first time I wore my mother’s knickers or why I was tempted to do so. I think I was 8 or 9 but I know that from the first time I couldn’t help myself and would do so whenever I could.
I knew it was wrong but couldn’t help myself, often sleeping in a pair under my pyjamas. I was too young for there to be any sexual element to it at the start, but as I hit puberty that developed.
I was a shy kid and didn’t know much about sex apart from the basics and wasn’t aware of what masturbation was. One night in bed when I was about 12 wearing a pair of knickers (white with a blue lace front panel) I started rubbing myself, not knowing why or the consequences, I soon was spurting making a gooey mess in my knickers. Well I couldn’t help myself and would daily from then masturbate whilst wearing knickers, the link was set.
I soon found that I enjoyed sniffing a pair of my mother’s worn knickers whilst masturbating and would do this as often as I could often spurting in to the gusset of worn knickers. I was very naive to think my mother wouldn’t notice and she soon challenged me about whether I was the person making a mess in her knickers, I denied it but my beet red face told the truth. I often wonder what would have happened if I’d told her the truth about wanting to wear knickers.
Whilst it was mainly knickers I did experiment with more dressing, tights, bra, stockings but not so much other clothes, that seemed to come later in life.
When I was older I told a friend about my knickers wearing/masturbating side. He thought it quite amusing but was able to get me a pair of his mother’s worn knickers to masturbate with. I was in heaven for a few weeks. This friend also let me watch him masturbate a couple of time. I was so shy, so would never have done anything but wished he’d asked me to help him. I know I would have quickly progressed from hand relief to sucking him.
I wonder too what would have happened if I had, how things would have turned out.....
The elegiac musings of roads not taken. The what if we all face so many times a day, some of those choices haunting us more than others....But we are who we are, and we must move on and forward.
Davina is a wonderful girl, steadfast in her resolve to be herself and enjoy who she is as much as possible, with the love of those around her. She has good days, and bad days....But always remembers that this is who she is, that the hurt will pass and she'll have moments that are precious to her, and that keep her going.
Her ability to find comfort in something so simple as the drifting scent of perfume off her wrist is very inspiring.....That, and moments like it, should help you all through the harder times.
Mistress Brianna xx